Rules
by I Run With Sporks
Summary: In which Wally is kidnapped, and is then forced into having a heart- to-heart with Cheshire


**I do not own Young Justice or its characters. Which is too bad, because I promise I'd take good care of them! Honest!**

Wally awoke with a splitting headache.

Bleary eyed, he squinted half from the pain, half from the light shinning very brightly down on him. Moving to rub his eyes, Wally discovered he was tied to a chair.

"What the- Robin, if this is a prank, it SUCKS! Where am I, even? Did you knock me out?!"

"Good. You're awake."

Wally snapped his head around to find the speaker, then winced. "Ouch! My neck hurts."

His captor made a noise of contempt, then moved to where he could see her easily. His heart almost stopped.

"Cheshire!"

"That's my name, don't wear it out. Well, not my real name, but," She leaned very close to him, bending down so they saw eye to eye. "It's all you're getting."

"What makes you think I don't your ID already?" Keep her talking...

"Maybe you do. I'm not real worried. And I wouldn't bother trying to use those _gifts_ of yours. I made sure to put an inhibitor on you after I knocked you out"

Wally stopped trying to make his molecules vibrate. "Dammit."

"You aren't going anywhere, Little Flash. Not until I say so. It's time we had a long overdue talk."

Wally stared at the assassin blankly. "Talk?"

"Talk," Cheshire confirmed, idly twirling a knife that looked as though it had come straight out of 'Naruto'. She positioned herself so that she could look Wally straight in the face and talk comfortably. Wally wondered how long this was going to take.

"I hear you've recently become involved with my little sister."

"Uh.." Wally said, unsure how to respond. This was _not_ the conversation he had expected. He wasn't sure what he _had_ expected, but this definitely wasn't it.

"'Uh', he says. It's a good thing for you Arty isn't into smart guys."

"Hey! I'm smart!"

"Oh, you think so? Well, here's the test." Cheshire's voice turned hard. "If you're _smart_ you'll pay close attention to what I'm about to say and remember it well. If you aren't, your life is about to get so bad so fast your head will spin. What's left of it, anyway."

Wally wasn't sure if she meant what was left of his head or his life, but felt it best not to find out.

"I'm listening!"

"Excellent." Cheshire jabbed a finger decorated with a poison green fingernail into his chest. "Rule Number One of dating Artemis Crock:"

Wally felt his jaw drop. Cheshire ignored him. "Don't get her hurt. I don't care if it was one of your missions, if you were sparring, if you bump into her and she trips. Harm one hair on her head and I will hunt you down.

"Similarly, we have Rule Number Two: Don't get her killed. Should this happen, under any circumstances-"

"I join her?" Wally guessed. As if he'd get his spitfire killed. If she went down, he'd go down with her.

"Wrong! If she dies..." Quick as lightning, Cheshire unsheathed her sai and touched the tip to his throat.

"...There will be no place on earth you can hide from me. I will find, catch you, and ensure that you spend the rest of your life in enough pain to wish you were never born. I will destroy your mind, break your spirit, and slowly tear your body to pieces. Bit. By. Bit."

The sultry, teasing aura usually surrounding the young assassin had vanished. Wally could tell that she meant every word and could undoubtedly back it up.

"Do you understand me?" Behind the grinning mask, her eyes had narrowed into slits.

"I do." He did his best to keep his voice steady.

"Very good." Cheshire re-sheathed her sai and continued. "Rule Number Three: When you break up-"

"You mean _if_ we break up, don't you?"

"I said _when_. When you break up, it will be because _she_ dumped _you_. I don't want to hear about you cheating on her or dumping her, or breaking her heart. And I WILL hear about it. I am everywhere. Clear?"

"I wouldn-"

"CLEAR?"

Wally gave a sigh of defeat. He wasn't used to being this patient with people.

"Clear."

"Wonderful. Rule Number Four: Artemis is a strong, smart, powerful girl. You will treat her with RESPECT. You don't want to know what happened to the last boyfriend who forgot this rule.

"I already respect her, she- wait, Artemis had boyfriends before me?"

"Rule Number Five: If you're taking her out on a date, make it someplace _good._ No fast food restaurants, no nightclubs, no-"

"Give me some credit here! A fast food joint?"

"No fast food. Ever. Rule Number Six:" Cheshire crossed her arms looking stern.

"Until there's a ring on her finger, you stay _out_ of her."

Wally choked on air. His face felt like it was on fire.

"Do not _touch_ her. I don't want her getting pregnant just because you felt needy one night. Firstly because I'm sure any child of yours would be a complete idiot, and secondly, because she's too softhearted to do the sensible thing and get rid of it. So when it comes to Artemis, LOOK BUT DON'T TOUCH. PAWS OFF. DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT."

"What kind of person do you think I _AM_?!" Wally finally spluttered out, face as red as a very red thing.

Cheshire put her hands on her hips. "I think you're a hormone- crazed teenage guy dating my very pretty sister!"

Loathe as he was to admit it, Wally couldn't deny that it was sort of true.

"But," Cheshire said, raising her finger in an 'ah-hah!' gesture. "You do seem to care about her, not just as your girlfriend, but as a person. Which is more than I can say for the last young idiot." She broke off, muttering darkly to herself for a moment.

"-And for some bizarre reason, Arty really does seem to care about you. You make her happy."

"I do?" Wally felt very pleased with himself.

"Yeah, you do. Happier then I've seen her with a guy before." Cheshire put her hands on Wally's shoulders, tone very serious.

"I need you to understand that my sister is one of the most important people in the world to me. I can't give her to just anyone. And you- well, I guess you aren't so bad."

"Thanks...I think."

Cheshire rolled her eyes before getting to her feet. "Just follow the rules and we'll be fine. Get it?"

"Got it."

"Good." With that, Cheshire pulled out a smoke bomb and smashed it on the ground. Wally gagged.

The smoke cleared, and he found himself alone, Cheshire undoubtedly long gone.

"Hey! You could've at least untied me!"


End file.
